The Power of the Heart to Overcome Addictions
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What heals all addiction Is another affliction called love. Love love, more than you love that substance or that feeling! It is so revealing! There is really nothing in between The feeling you crave from the substance that makes you its slave And love itself. When you see that overuse and abuse cuts you off from this source Choosing freedom is a matter of course. The choice is already made All addiction is really a different affliction Called love. When you are willing to love without object of your desire Ah! But sweet then you are lit by a succulent fulfillment fire. Put your addiction on that fun-eral pire.
One of my favorite groups of clients to work with is addicts- people addicted to hard core substances like heroin. It surprises people when I tell them that. But what I love about addicts is that they know at some innate level that we can feel great in life (Fyera!), and they are committed to experiencing that. Where they have gone off is in the distorted perception that the feel good they seek will come from something outside of themselves like a drug or a repetitive behavior. But at the core, they understand that feeling great is a great thing. They are passionate.
We think of addiction as something that only alcoholics, “druggies” or gamblers experience. In fact, most of us have addictions, because an addiction is anything that owns your sense of well being rather than you owning it. In other words, Fyera! is that feel great feeling that you source within your own heart, and nothing and no one can take that away. That means no substance, no event, no person, no activity is required to generate your feel good- just you and your own heart. Anything that comes between you and the power to feel good- whether it is the belief that you need a certain person, substance, activity, or outcome in your life in order to feel good about yourself or to feel ok- can be considered an addiction.
Like most stress, addictions trigger old survival systems in the brain and nervous system. In the case of addiction, most people begin by seeking pleasure, which at Fyera! we can scientifically prove is good for your immunity, your hormones, and your higher cognitive centers. But in the case of addiction, people do not experience true pleasure. What they experience instead is the erroneous neural associations made in their head that without this external stimulus they are addicted to, they will die. When the body interprets physiologically that its life is at stake, it shuts down higher brain centers and will go into full predator mode, doing anything and everything it can to get what it believes will be key to its survival. This is why people with addictions will end up doing or saying things to get their fix that they may regret or perhaps not even remember later. They are experiencing the shut down of higher brain centers in the pure survival association to their addiction. The irony is that usually what drew them to their addiction in the first place was a desire for full living and fulfillment. With cortical inhibition and survival physiology triggered, their life takes an opposite turn, as their brain and emotions fixate on addictive craving burn. With tools to transform the association of the addictive substance or stimulus to survival in the nervous system and brain (which can be accessed with heart intelligence taught in the beginner Fyera! Webinars), the person is empowered to see the bigger picture and experience the real pleasure their addiction was a false road to find, with all the benefits of real pleasure and no “hangover” to unwind.
Feeling great is simply an internal state, one that can be self generated by creating coherent heart rhythms. With the emWave, we teach people to become their own source of feel good, so then whatever they are addicted to becomes an add-on in life instead of a desperate greed or need that lives them longing to be freed.
Exercise: What do you need in order to feel good? In order to feel successful? In order to feel esteem? Asking yourself what your “in order to’s…” are can unveil hidden addictions and set you free.
If you feel that you need anything in life besides your own choice to feel good, you may have an addiction. Addictions create a lot of stress, because you may not always be able to have the external thing that you think sources your happiness. But you can always source your happiness. So the freedom from addictions is in fact freedom from stress. The contradiction of addiction is that the more you feel you need something, the less you can actually enjoy it, because driven by compulsion there is always the threat of loss. When you are empowered to source your own feel-good from the inside out, there will never be any doubt in the continued fulfillment of your desire. This is the true Fyera! Addicts are often trying just to feel the way they imagine others must: good. And because they do not feel the way they think they should, they self medicate with their addictive substance or stimulus, which in the long term tends to make them worse and create downward spirals of negative life events to boot. At Fyera!, not only do we help and addict to break free of their initial cravings, but we also treat the underlying depression, anxiety, and self defeating emotional patterns or past traumas that cause the drive to self medicate in the first place.
I battled depression on and off since my teens. During my late thirties, I fell into a serious funk and had little hope of emerging from its depths. And when you feel hopeless, you cannot see the resources that are inside of you. At times it got so bad, that I hoped an accident would happen that would blow me to smithereens just to change the way that I felt. I was looking for anything external to put a stop to my unbearable feelings. I went for cocaine, ecstasy, sexual adventures, and alcohol. I was like two different people: an impeccably responsible, professional corporate woman by day and a wild alter ego by night.
I kept thinking that if I went to some place, took some trip, or vacation, or had a different identity, that I would feel better. I would travel, with drugs, airplanes, fantasies or even antidepressants and tranquilizers, to get away from my depression. I planned elaborate vacations and looked forward to them obsessively. The planning and anticipation of a trip provided a welcome distraction from my feelings. I fantasized about how I would feel once I arrived at my vacation destination. The funny this was, it never felt the way I imagined it would and I frequently spent my vacations feeling disappointed. To avoid these disappointed feelings, I often spent my vacations drinking, using drugs and seeking sexual adventures. By the time I would return from a vacation, I was full of even more self loathing and despair.
At the conclusion of one such vacation, as I was waiting for my luggage at the baggage claim, I panicked at the thought of returning to my normal life. I went to the flight monitor and frantically scanned the list of departures with the intention of turning around and flying somewhere else and beginning the process all over. The problem was, as I envisioned myself in each city – Puerto Vallarta, Vancouver, Seattle, etc. – the picture always looked the same and I saw myself feeling sad, lonely and hopeless in each destination. At that moment, I realized that I needed to return home – both physically and metaphorically – in order to heal. I could no longer look to things outside of me to make me feel better. It’s the old expression, wherever you go, there you are. The only way I was going to heal the hurt inside of me was to learn some tools for self-healing. I realized that I had to look within and heal myself. Until I did that, I was never going to find peace, no matter where my travels took me.
Fyera! gave me some key tools that served as my ticket home. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. I was ready. And the teacher was right there in my heart, accessed with HeartMath tools from a Fyera! coach that I met in a day spa.
HeartMath allowed me to access my own internal wisdom. It taught me to regulate my physiology, by taking dominion over my feelings and thoughts. Through HeartMath, and Fyera! I received access to the natural pharmacy in my brain and heart, rather than having to call the drug dealer.
Now when I travel, it is not to escape my feelings, but to fully experience them in whatever environment I am in. My environment no longer dictates my feelings. I bring all of me to whatever location I’m exploring, at home or afar. This allows me to fully experience everything that a particular location and its culture have to offer. I now feel enriched and re-energized, rather than depleted, after a vacation. And I have been drug and alcohol free for the 14 months I have been practicing HeartMath. I no longer need to pick up a drink or use recreational drugs to alter my feelings; instead, I can access my body’s natural pharmacy through my thoughts and feelings. When challenging feelings arise, I no longer have to run away from that part of myself: I know how to take care of it instead. Perhaps the most surprising and fulfilling part of this process is that now I am in a committed and loving relationship, based on mutual emotional intimacy rather than escapist fantasy. In the past, if I felt hurt or uncomfortable in relationships I would blame the other person, and run away. I would flit from one relationship to another like a hummingbird to different flowers, never staying long enough for anyone to find out who I really was. Now it is the opposite. I lead with my authentic self and real feelings, speaking my truth with tools I learned from HeartMath and Fyera!. Instead of feeling split in two, I feel like a whole me. Getting answers from within rather than trying to fix myself with a fix has changed every dimension of my life. I am so grateful for HeartMath and to Sheva from Fyera! who brought the wisdom of the heart to me.
Enterpreneur, Bay Area CA
I’ve always been slightly depressed, for as long as I can remember. At the age of 22, I first noticed symptoms of severe thought loops and obsessive thought patterns. That’s when my struggle with alcohol also began, which I now see was my way of trying to self medicate the imbalance in my emotions and thinking. They diagnosed me with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder at that time. I think I also had ADD, but they did not have a diagnosis for it back then. ADD, depression, addiction, and Obessive Compulsive Disorder are different choruses of the same song; they are partners in crime.
My thoughts and emotions ran me ragged. I felt powerless in the face of my own negativity. As a result of my alcohol abuse and depression, I was not the father or the husband my kids and first wife needed. The odd thing is, that even though it ruined my first family, I still tried to justify my drinking in my second marriage. I brushed off the idea that it was a detriment, saying that it added to our fun and our partying lifestyle. The truth is, I was terrified to stop drinking because it was the only time I felt any good feeling at all. Drinking was the only time a saw a small window out of the jail cell of my OCD, ADD, and depression.
The depression hit me the hardest while I was working on my 21st feature film in a row with far too few breaks. A prop master in Hollywood, I worked crazy hours and was under extreme pressure. I drank and worked myself into exhaustion, until I could not handle it anymore. I crashed hard. I stopped working. I did not leave my house for over a month. I could barely get out of bed. I would wake up each day feeling like I simply could not respond to the basic tasks of the day. And I still relied on alcohol to quiet the turmoil underneath the despair.
The breaking point came while we were visiting my in-laws and attending a Kansas City Chiefs football game. As usual, I drank too much too hard too fast at the game. The next thing I knew, I woke up in the shower at my in-laws, being told what had happened. Apparently, I had humiliated myself in front of 65,000 people, worst of all in front of my wife and her parents. I was dangerously close to ruining my second marriage. I knew this had to stop. But I did not know how. That’s when I turned to HeartMath, Fyera! and to the power of my heart.
Needing income, I leveraged my connections in props to set up a business getting high end jewelry for film producers at low prices. It was at a networking meeting for that business that I met Sheva from Fyera! This was something I had never heard of, the idea that there is a brain in your heart that you can think with. I was fascinated by that. Something seemed right about it, and it gave me hope. I needed something, and I was willing to try on this new perspective because nothing else I had tried worked. I tried AA, but I was filled with too much negativity to receive what it had to offer. I tried a 30 day rehab, but it was the same problem. I was not ready. I was too full of judgment and resistance to let anything in. HeartMath was the tool I needed to open me up to the other tools that were available to me.
It was the HeartMath process of connecting to a good feeling, locking that in, and sustaining it that really helped me the most. With the help of the HeartMath coach, I saw that what I had been chasing in alcohol was just a good feeling that was really inside me all along. HeartMath empowered me to get it from within instead of from a bottle, and without the hangover!
Before HeartMath, I was in such a negative state that I did not see or could not use the other resources around me. Diet changes, retreats, supplements, all these things have been helpful since HeartMath opened me up to what they have to offer. And alongside them, the heart has been a leading resource in my road to wellness for my emotional diet, my emotional supplements, my emotional retreat back to the truer me.
For the first time I greet each day feeling positive, feeling powerful, feeling hopeful, looking forward to my future. I truly feel like HeartMath gave me a new start on life.
My own internal vodka tap
After battling with alcohol addiction for 4 years I've finally found peace and harmony through Fyera! No longer do I need to reach for a drink in response to any stress related situation. Heartmathing has enabled me to harness feelings of serenity and calm I initially "gained" from alcohol. But the only side effect is improved health next day! Not only is it natural and therapeutic for both mind and body - it all lies within! It's like having my own healthy internal vodka tap! Many thanks Sheva for showing me a tool that has truely changed my life.
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Signs and Symptoms of addiction
- Change in friends. Hanging out with a new group.
- Seclusive behavior - long periods spent in self imposed isolation.
- Long, unexplained absences.
- Lying and stealing.
- Involvement on the wrong side of the law.
- Deteriorating family relationships.
- Obvious intoxication, delirious, incoherent or unconscious.
- Changes in behavior and attitude.
- Decrease in school performance.
List of symptoms of Addiction:
- Uncontrolled cravings
- Obsessive thought about the addiction
- Energy focused on the addiction
- School truancy
- Nasal congestion
- Eye changes
- Glassy eyes
- Behavioral changes
- Over-spending money
Some Types of Addiction:
- Drugs/substances (alcohol, ecstasy, cocaine, marijuana, heroine, speed, glue, spray paint, caffeine, nicotine, etc)
• One day Beat Stress in a Heartbeat seminar will teach you how to be the source of your own feel good, not because you “should” but so you can be free of any substance person place or activity that you think you need to feel up to speed.
• Private Coaching – personally tailored to your specific needs, the private coaching will help you establish in 4-5 discreet sessions a map out of addiction and into the real feel good your addiction is trying to bring you.
• emWave technology- this is an essential aspect of addiction recovery- it becomes a behavioral intervention that empowers you to deal with cravings and stand on your own two feet until your addiction is completely beat.
• Sanesco Testing and supplements: one of the things that goes awry for an addict is that, like a Pavlovian dog, they have trained their brain and nervous system chemistry to source feel good neurotransmitters and endorphins from an outer substance or stimulus rather than self generating their own. Sanesco testing can isolate precisely what neurotransmitters, hormones, and endorphins are at play in this way, and supplementation of these hormone and neurotransmitter precursors can accelerate the success of the emotional management tools you will learn in the class and coaching model. HeartMath tools will empower you to become your own internal pharmacist, so that you can self generate the feel good that you were trying to get in decreasing returns and increasing cost with your addictive cycle, and Sanesco supplements will supply you with the building materials to do so until you can fly free and do it on your own. www.sanesco.net
Overcoming Emotional Chaos
The HeartMath Solution
emWave – craving intervention, rebuilding neurotransmitters and hormones
Core Values – getting to the real feel good
Neutral – shifting longstanding hormone and emotional upheaval
Quick Coherence – getting to the real feel good
Perception Shift – making better choices, dealing with cravings
Heart Lock-In – sustaining the real feel good without the substance or external stimulus
Cut-Thru – addressing the root cause of addiction, which is usually an old emotional pattern or affliction that the addiction is an attempt to self medicate- the cut-thru tool will resolve this at the root
Fyera is now offering a year long HeartMastery Program.
A great deal only $6/hour of class time. Click here to learn more.